IT’S XMAS AGAIN!
New, Improved 2008 Version of the World Famous Burke Family’s Tacky Xmas Nonsense Commercial Free, no Spam, no Pop-ups, no Class.Subscription Notification
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The family visited the Australian Outback, Catherine created compost, James went crazy with Woodcraft, Moira continued toward the Nobel Prize in intelligence, Liam began plans to save the planet from Global Warming. The deaf cat was obnoxious.Master Gardener’s Corner
When asked what to report, Catherine said she really hadn’t done anything- WRONG! She is participating in a landscaping sustainability program with the county extension service, creating mountains of compost, and answering questions on the hot line:Caller: “I need help with all the green stuff growing in my closet.”
Catherine: “You do realize that the police are monitoring this radio program and take a dim view of marijuana cultivating.”
Caller: “I’m not growing dope, you dope- it’s that green sticky stuff on the walls.”
Catherine: “I’d recommend scraping some off, blend with lo-fat crème cheese and spread on crackers.”
Caller: “Far Out Man! I tried to smoke it, but it wouldn’t stay lit.”
Xmas Poem
‘Twas the night ‘fore elections And all through the land
Not a banker was breathing, not even the clown
The bailouts were given, the congress was bribed
The money was flowing, our country lost out.
Not a banker was breathing, not even the clown
The bailouts were given, the congress was bribed
The money was flowing, our country lost out.
Liam steps back on the grid to save the world
Liam has been matriculating at the local college toward a degree in environmental energy conservation and technical design for building in the future. With the raising awareness of global climate concerns and the move to green, he sees an important future ahead. He continues to work multiple jobs, a significant accomplishment with so many out of work today, and enjoy life. He has been actively participating in the local house-party circuit. {Pause}. Participating by playing his guitar in various bands, that is.The highlight of the year was a rafting trip down the Descutes River with his father and uncles.
Groundhogs, etc.
Moira began 2008 by traveling to nearby Punxatawney, Pennsylvania, to view the prognosticating groundhog. After he predicted more winter, she went back inside and continued to work on her dissertation for six more weeks. In addition to her research on social psychological phenomena in Wikipedia and online cancer support groups, she is also exploring the way that online communities can be useful forums for social support for adults on the high-functioning end of the autism spectrum, and has been consulting with autism experts and autistic students in Pittsburgh. She expects this research will take exactly as long as it takes the economy to perk back up.
Meanwhile, she continues to travel the world and make her parents jealous. This years' trips included hiking and eating (and presenting at a conference) in Florence and Cinque Terre, Italy, and a multi-day backpacking trip on the Inca Trail in Peru with friends. Over the summer she did a research internship in Palo Alto at Facebook, and authored the first peer-reviewed article to be accepted for academic publication out of the company. Meanwhile, she spent every weekend in California hiking and kayaking. Now back in Pittsburgh, she keeps other grad students well fed with themed dinner parties (check out the VP debate menu on her blog, http://www.thoughtcrumbs.com).
Photo: Kids and Catherine with Catherine's 96-year-old mother, Mary Kay.
The much anticipated Annual Recipe.
This year featuring Recession Bread
- Mix lots of free green dough in a huge depression bowl. Denominations of $1,000,000 bills work well. (Alfred E Newman is on that particular bill.)
- Beat with a taxpayer until senseless.
- Cook in a 7 Billion degree oven for 6 months.
- Slice generously and give to anyone not starving.
- Leftovers should be choked down with greasy Congressional Pork
Ding Dong the Witch is Dead
Woodcraft was sold
Woodcraft was sold
After ten years of franchise hell, the family saw the light and dumped the Woodcraft retail store. History will be rewritten to show this was the sentinel event that triggered the global economic crash of 2008-09. Finding themselves unemployed and bored, James & Catherine bought an 1892 farmhouse in town. The good news was that the foreclosing bank was thrilled to practically give it away. The bad news they wouldn’t take any of the twenty feral cats living under it. Update on the current money pit this time next year.
Photo: The farmhouse we're renovating.
And so ends this year’s update.
We again send our prayers to you for Health, Happiness, Prosperity, and Joy.
And your share of a bailout.
And your share of a bailout.
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